Researchers at George Mason University interviewed 15 grandmothers about how they guide their grandchildren's feelings. Their own family stories were the tool they reached for.
Researchers Interviewed 15 Grandmothers About Their Grandchildren's Feelings. One Said: "I Want Kids to Be Heard, Unlike My Family."
In a 2026 study in Frontiers in Developmental Psychology, Pamela Garner, Julia Shadur, and Hideko Bassett found that grandmothers used stories from their own lives to teach emotional lessons, sometimes by describing what they chose to do differently from how they were raised.
Most of us picture a grandmother's stories as entertainment. A funny thing that happened in the old neighborhood. How she met your grandfather. Something to listen to on a slow afternoon.
A research team at George Mason University listened more closely. They interviewed 15 grandmothers about how they talk with their grandchildren about feelings, and what came back were stories. **The grandmothers' own family narratives were how they taught emotional lessons.**
One of them put it in a single sentence: "I want kids to be heard, unlike my family."
1. Fifteen grandmothers, each asked about their grandchildren's feelings
The researchers interviewed **15 grandmothers, ages 50 to 76,** living in the Mid-Atlantic region of the United States. Six identified as Black American, four as Latina, three as Black Caribbean, and two as White Jewish. All were non-residential, meaning they did not live in the same home as their grandchildren.
Each took part in a **45 to 60 minute interview,** in person or over Zoom, and the team analyzed what they said using established frameworks for how families teach children to handle emotion. The paper was published on March 31, 2026.
This was a small, careful look at what grandmothers say, not a count of how many families do what.
2. Their own stories were the way they taught
The authors report that the grandmothers' family narratives emerged as **a primary tool for guiding their grandchildren's emotional lives.** The grandmothers described encouraging their grandchildren to express what they felt, and helping them find ways to settle themselves.
One said: "I encouraged my grandson to cry…you let it flow, you are a human being." The paper describes these accounts as showing both generational change and the passing down of emotional values rooted in culture and family.
The lesson did not arrive as a rule. It arrived inside a story about how someone lived.
3. Some told it as a contrast with the home they grew up in
The researchers noted contrasts between the restrictive upbringings some grandmothers had known and the way they now responded to their grandchildren. One grandmother said it plainly: **"I want kids to be heard, unlike my family."**
That sentence is a small piece of family history. It tells a grandchild something about the house their grandmother grew up in, and about a choice she made on purpose. **Without the story, the choice looks like personality. With it, it looks like love with a reason behind it.**
The study has limits the authors name themselves: a small sample, one region, self-reported accounts, and no view of how the grandchildren experienced any of it.
A story can carry what you chose to do differently, and why. That is easy to lose if nobody ever asks.
I want kids to be heard, unlike my family.A grandmother interviewed in Garner, Shadur, and Bassett (2026), Frontiers in Developmental Psychology
What you get with LifeScribe
- A 2026 study in Frontiers in Developmental Psychology interviewed 15 grandmothers, ages 50 to 76, about guiding their grandchildren's feelings.
- Interviews ran 45 to 60 minutes, in person or over Zoom, and the authors found the grandmothers' family narratives were a primary way they taught emotional lessons.
- Some described their approach as a contrast with the homes they grew up in, a story most families never hear told out loud.
- Built on documented research: Garner, Shadur, and Bassett, George Mason University, 2026.
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The reasons behind the way your family loves are worth keeping. Just a phone call, free. Ari asks about where you came from and what you chose to do differently, so it is kept in your own voice for the people you love.
These grandmothers were asked, and they had stories ready. Most families never ask. The reasons behind how someone loved their children and grandchildren often go unspoken until nobody is left to explain them, and by then the people who wanted to understand can only guess.
Tell them why you loved them the way you did.
Ari calls and listens, so the stories behind your choices, and what you wanted to do differently, are kept in your own voice for the people you love.
Questions grandparents ask us
What did the study actually find?
A 2026 study in Frontiers in Developmental Psychology found that 15 grandmothers, ages 50 to 76, used their own family narratives as a primary way to guide their grandchildren's emotional expression and to pass down values.
How was the study done?
Researchers at George Mason University conducted 45 to 60 minute interviews with 15 non-residential grandmothers in the Mid-Atlantic United States, in person or over Zoom, and analyzed the transcripts using established frameworks for how families teach children about emotion.
Who took part?
Fifteen grandmothers: six Black American, four Latina, three Black Caribbean, and two White Jewish, with education ranging from high school diplomas to doctoral degrees.
Does the study show how grandchildren were affected?
No. The authors note the study relied on what the grandmothers reported, and did not observe families or ask the grandchildren. It also covered a small group in one region, so it cannot say how common these patterns are.